Today you’ll learn how to finally stop worrying to start living again.
Because worrying makes you feel exhausted, stressed, anxious and often prevents you from achieving what you want in life, we need to fix this.
- But what causes your worry?
- What can we do to significantly worry less?
- And how do we do this in as little time as possible?
We need to figure that out, because only then you can worry less and enjoy our life to the fullest.
Good news for us, because the process is quite simple.
When you practice the 2 techniques in this blog post daily, you’ll start to worry significantly less and your life will change inevitably.
As a chronic worrier myself, I used these techniques to reduce my worry by 90% and I’ll show you right now how you can do that too!
My World Changed After I learned This
If you are like me then you are probably familiar with the following:
You were just happily living your day, but suddenly a worry popped up in your mind. What-if (fill in the blank). You try to think your worry away, but another one pops up and soon you are living inside your mind trying to tackle worry after worry.
As someone with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, I was sick of worrying all the time and needed to find a solution… so I grabbed the following book.
How to overcome worry and GAD from Kevin Meares.
It felt like the author had specifically written it for me.
So, I read the 400-page book in a week and was blown away by the results… I worried about 90% less!
How in the name of GOD?
But before I share with you the 2 techniques from this book that made me worry significantly less, you first need to know why you worry!
Because knowing that is the first step to worrying less!
This is The Root of all Worry
I always believed that I worried so much because of all the situations that happened in my life. Situations that created uncertainty… big things like moving out or small things, like if the serious email from my boss meant bad news was on my way.
Because that is why we worry right? To eliminate uncertainty and to solve problems. But after some thinking I discovered the following:
It is not the situation that causes worry, nor is it the uncertainty… it’s your intolerance of uncertainty.
If you worry a lot, it is likely that you are very intolerant of uncertainty.
That explains the difference between people who worry a lot and people who barely worry. People who don’t worry a lot have a high tolerance for uncertainty.
For example, two people want to go to a party but they have no clue about the dress code. This creates uncertainty. The person with a high tolerance for uncertainty might say “well, I’ll wear whatever I like, we’ll discover the dress code at the party”, while the person with a low tolerance for uncertainty might start to worry about “what if people reject me, what if I wear the wrong thing and what if I make a fool of myself.”
Same situation. Different results, based on your intolerance of uncertainty. Like people who sneeze more have an intolerance with pollen, while you have this with worry.
What does this mean? When something happens that creates uncertainty, people with a high tolerance of uncertainty embrace the discomfortable feeling, while people with a low tolerance start to worry in the hope they eliminate uncertainty.
I know what you are thinking: isn’t a world without uncertainty great?
Curious how such world looks like? Let me briefly show it to you!
When you live in a world without uncertainty, you’ll always predict the weather, you know who will win the lottery or win the next world cup. You’ll never be surprised anymore and know what you get for your birthday, you no longer feel the excitement of not knowing something and never try out new things, because everything is certain. You live in a robotic world.
Is that the world you want to live in?
No… uncertainty adds magic to your life.
Knowing this makes you ready for the first powerful technique.
Practice Technique #1
Now you know that your intolerance of uncertainty is where your little worries are born, we have to do the following: Practice tolerating uncertainty.
The more we can feel comfortable with uncertainty, the less likely we feel we need to worry… which is something I also explain in my Free Training on Anxiety.
I was someone who made excessive lists and schedules in the hope to eliminate all uncertainty regarding the growth of my online business. I worried about making a living online for hours a day and with these lists, I thought I was in control.
So I became aware of that habit and gradually tried to stop doing those things, all in the hope to learn how to tolerate more uncertainty.
This will feel uncomfortable at first and you’ll feel a need to worry even more, but try practising staying with this feeling… and what you’ll notice is that the discomfort decreases over time.
But doing this alone won’t get you far… that’s why you need technique #2!
Worry is Exactly Like…
Do you also find it frustrating that when you worry about something, more worries pop up?
This can easily make you worry for the entire day. And soon you’re worrying about EVERYTHING.
Worry is like traffic on the highway. If it is too busy on the highway and we want to instantly reduce traffic, we can do two things:
- Ask every individual driver why he takes the highway and convince him to leave.
- Or we can target the beliefs all drivers have about taking the highway?
People take the highway because they believe it is useful, gets them to their destination fast and is efficient.
You worry because you believe it is useful as well.
So what do we do with this information?
Practice Technique #2
After I became aware of my beliefs about worry, I was shocked.
I believed worrying would help me find solutions to my problems, I believed it would motivate me, I believed it protected me from danger and I believed that if I worried about my work… I would show my boss I cared.
And then I realized: If the beliefs I had about worry seemed so positive? Why would I ever stop worrying?
You worry a lot, because you believe it is useful in some way… and if you stop worrying… bad things might happen.
So, it is super important to take a pen and paper and write down what you believe about worry, right after you finished the video.
- Do you believe worrying helps you solve your problems?
- Do you believe worrying helps to protect yourself and others from danger?
- Do you believe it helps you show people you care?
- Does it help you to motivate yourself or find solutions?
Write them down and start questioning them!
So, let’s take my belief: “If I worry I show my boss I care.”
I would ask myself: “Is this really the best way to show my boss I care?”
Then I would answer with a firm NO and do the following: I look at the worry I wrote down and underneath write down 3-5 things I can do INSTEAD of worrying that would show my boss I care.
“Asking my boss for feedback, being on time or sharing ideas”, for example.
Do this for the 3-5 most important beliefs you have about the benefits of worry and practice doing these action items daily, because you show your brain that you take action and that there is no need to worry about it.
The moment you learn to tolerate uncertainty and can stay with the discomfort it creates, you become more tolerant of it. You’ll feel less of an urge to worry and embrace the great things uncertainty creates.
But this only won’t solve your worry problem, it only reduces the creation of worries.
Because when you also bring awareness to the reasons WHY you worry, question those beliefs and identify other things you can do instead of worrying… you’ll notice you start to worry significantly less.
If you want to learn more about overcoming worry and anxiety, watch my FREE Limited Time Training right now.
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